Name-Expression...

Hi everyone,

As you probably noticed - the scenery has changed here, and for those of you who usually notice little details, there’s more than meets the eye, a lot MORE than new colors and templates…

Friends, I decided to share with you something personal that happened very recently in my life. My husband and I are getting a divorce. I know that it is very sudden, and it came as a huge surprise to all the people who got to know us as couple… and yet, the decision has been made, the procedures are in process, and this is the right thing to do.

On Saturday, the morning after the decision to break up was made, I felt the extreme urge to change everything here, at my blog. First, there was the name issue. I realized that I’m no longer “Xen Dolev”. But until I’ll have the official papers I can’t officially change my name back to my maiden name “Xen Mendelsohn”. So, for now it’ll be just “Xen”. It’s not that bad actually. But then, I noticed that my name is writen all around (!), so I started changing it everywhere I could... Yet there's a major problem with my blog’s URL since it contains my "old" name in it: “http://XenDolev.typepad.com”. If that is not enough, everyone in the blog sphere knows me by that name and URL...! [For the URL problem, I really need a “redirect link” - If someone knows how to make one, please leave me a comment or an e-mail (thanks!)].

I realized that a name says something about us too – it’s not just something we use as a username or as part of an e-mail address. Think of a social gathering where people mingle: it really makes a different statement if I introduce myself with an academic title (B.A.? Dr? MD?) civil title (Mrs.? Miss?), first and last (last name by marriage? maiden name?) or just by my first name “Xen”. Thinking about it, my beloved Klonie has a very big advantage not having a last name… :)

Well, if I can’t just personalize my name yet, I would then personalize my blog to better express myself! Suddenly my life and my work blend into one another and I really FEEL the extreme desire\ need\ urge to reinvestigate my identity and to express myself as the genuine Xen, as I know she really is. At this moment, my Klonie here really expresses the way I feel now… :(

Comments

[Heather Meadows]

Xen,

Once your blog is set up on a new site, replace your homepage here with an html file called index.htm that contains the following code inside the *head* portion:

*meta http-equiv="refresh" content="10; url=link" /*

[Note that where I've put *, you need to have the less than/greater than signs used in HTML.]

Replace the 10 with however many seconds you want it to pause. (You could, for example, design a page there that explains what's going on, and leave the user there for awhile to read it. Or you could set it to 0 and have them automatically go to the new page. If you do the latter, there's no need to put anything in the body of the page, really.)

And, of course, replace the word 'link' with the new url of the blog. Remember to start the url with http://.

If you have any questions, you can always email me!

[Xen]

Heather,
thanks! You're the greatest!
I'll start working on it :)

[Martin]

Hi Xen,
I could really feel your pain reading these lines... what a courageous young woman! It's very hard to do what you did here. I'm sure you'll find your way in life.
I wish you all the best!

[Jasmin]

Girl, you'll be A ok in no time!

[Sara]

Hi Xen,
I know what you're feeling. I was at the same situation when I got devorced a few years ago. Suddenly you feel that no name really expresses who you are. But you know what's the good part? That you can choose! You can create yourself! Choose a name that you like, choose a name that has a meaning to you!
Hold on girl, and don't cry. You'll be just fine, I'm sure of that! :-)